The latest...
May. 2nd, 2005 09:03 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
hdsqrlI've given in. I told the ex that if both kids could practice on the same night, that I would be willing to make the drive up north to practice where he can still coach them next season. However, as I said, both kids will need to practice on the same night, and I will no longer assistant coach, and he said that was fine, and thank you. I'm not pleased with myself for agreeing to that, but as you have to pick your battles, I'm letting this one go. C gave me a long lecture on Saturday night about how I need to not let the ex get to me (I woke up extremely nauseous on Saturday morning due to nerves about dealing with the ex) and he's right. I should only get worked up about things I can control. Since I can't control how much of an ass he's going to be, and since the kids are (at least for now) willing to deal with the long drive, it'll be okay. *sighs*
It hit me on the drive back to C's after the games (both of which were lost, wahh) that I was having the Really Bad Thoughts about the ex again. Apparently it's somewhat normal for you to wish your ex (or soon to be ex) would die or somehow otherwise disappear, especially when things are really stressful, because it's tied into your survival instinct. When you feel threatened, you want to eliminate the threat. So that made me think...in what way do I feel threatened? I think the answer is that I feel like he's threatening my newly found independence. So...to deal with that, I made my own terms to the soccer situation, and will move on. The kids are bright and will find out on their own just how much time we're spending in the car, so maybe next Spring they'll opt to play more locally, but for now...let it go, and move on.
I think my garage sale will be the weekend after next, which means I REALLY need to get off my ass and start organizing for it. One of my friends said he'll help me with it and will put in some of his stuff too, so that will be nice. :) I've got an awards ceremony for school to go to on Wednesday, and since I graduated with "departmental honors", I'm hoping there will be a certificate or something for me. Regardless, there's a light buffet, so free food is a bonus. :)
Got a crazy busy week ahead of me...something is going on every single night. This weekend, we should be able to paint Connor's room, so hooray for that. I think I'm going to try to get down to Curves this week and get back on track with getting some exercise...so, that said, I'm off. Might as well get it over with right now.
Bleh @ feeling fat.
It hit me on the drive back to C's after the games (both of which were lost, wahh) that I was having the Really Bad Thoughts about the ex again. Apparently it's somewhat normal for you to wish your ex (or soon to be ex) would die or somehow otherwise disappear, especially when things are really stressful, because it's tied into your survival instinct. When you feel threatened, you want to eliminate the threat. So that made me think...in what way do I feel threatened? I think the answer is that I feel like he's threatening my newly found independence. So...to deal with that, I made my own terms to the soccer situation, and will move on. The kids are bright and will find out on their own just how much time we're spending in the car, so maybe next Spring they'll opt to play more locally, but for now...let it go, and move on.
I think my garage sale will be the weekend after next, which means I REALLY need to get off my ass and start organizing for it. One of my friends said he'll help me with it and will put in some of his stuff too, so that will be nice. :) I've got an awards ceremony for school to go to on Wednesday, and since I graduated with "departmental honors", I'm hoping there will be a certificate or something for me. Regardless, there's a light buffet, so free food is a bonus. :)
Got a crazy busy week ahead of me...something is going on every single night. This weekend, we should be able to paint Connor's room, so hooray for that. I think I'm going to try to get down to Curves this week and get back on track with getting some exercise...so, that said, I'm off. Might as well get it over with right now.
Bleh @ feeling fat.
